What's the most valuable lesson you've learned in life, and how has it impacted your journey so far?

But Tess! I mean Betty! I mean Veronica! (I can never remember who is who) which ever one you are, I love you!

After you lather me up with that strawberry hand lotion.

¡Explotando Dick por todos lados!

How can I get my ex-husband to love me again?

In order to answer this I came up with a little story that goes like this …

Shameless vixen! Trollop!

Two letters of transit signed by General De Gaulle … Stimpy, you eediot!

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In 1954 complete bastard and censorship campaigner Fredric Wertham published a book for the stated goal of creating a moral panic around comic book's alleged impact on juvenile delinquency. Much like the House Committee on Un-American Activities' disastrous impact on the film industry, the Comics Code Authority (obey, puny humans) put many hardworking comic book characters out of work all because of one poorly written book called …

Marijuana makes Jesus cry!

Tess' boyfriend, Ed, now works as a Peter Lorre impersonator.

Why does my cat get anxious during loud noises like thunderstorms or firework displays? Is this a common behavior for cats, and is there a way to help them cope with it?

And then working as Betty and Veronica's body doubles ...

Every day is a good day to punch a Nazi! I mean MAGA! I mean the Comics Code Authority! (I can never remember who is who)

I hear you're a stunt-double now for Fred in Scooby-Doo.

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Let's do what we always do, lay around half-naked while men make terrible jokes at our expense.

Torchy, we're unemployed … And no one is hiring scantily-clad wastrels these days.

Of all the layoffs, Torchy Todd and her gal pal, Tess Parker, were hit the hardest.

What are the major contributing factors to the current slump in demand for Tesla vehicles in Europe?

Ironically, Wertham focused on stories about crime, singling out Batman and Robin for its gay subtext and Dick Tracy for its violence.

Remember, kids, masturbation will make you see the devil everywhere!

Make Nazis afraid again!

Google, Meta and Snap think this tech is the next big thing - CNN

Speaking of which, poor Cleo Coco has ended up appearing in anti-vice pamphlets.

Yes, Tess, crime doesn't pay but apparently Rated-G horror does.

Torchy thinks: Maybe I could play a gangster's moll since apparently smoking is still seen as wholesome and American.

How do I find a hot guy?

Times might be tough … But at least there's one thing we all agree on.

Only zombies dig to rock and roll, daddy-O!

“Your boyfriend is a total perv, mommy.”

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Dick! I heard about the lay-off. What's a square-jaw crime fighter doing these days to bring in the bling?

Before there was MAGA there was … the Comics Code Authority

Just you, me, in a vat of lime jello, pulling hair, calling each other names …

David Beckham scores a winner with the royal circle - BBC

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I've also been making ends meet ... By appearing in Tijuana splatter comics as Evil Gringo #2.

And I ended up moonlighting in Japanese porn, but the less said about that the better.

What 10 things have you stopped doing in your life?

Perhaps now we can explore what being a “gal pal” really means.

Sex! Lingerie! Knock knock jokes!

At least until the peyote kicks in ...

Gadzooks! It's Torchy Todd slumming it in Yugoslavian science fiction! The shame!